


Up & Down

by saccharineflower



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, M/M, Mild Smut, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Acceptance, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 02:10:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13917150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saccharineflower/pseuds/saccharineflower
Summary: Kyungsoo thinks there's a beauty behind terrible things. Even being a terrible person himself.Jongdae agrees.





	Up & Down

**Author's Note:**

> /i dont know if this even have a proper plot and its unbeta-ed so bear if there are typos and grammatical errors/  
> /7,029 words vomit/  
> /too kinky for a virgin kyungsoo/

"Deal?"

Kyungsoo groans as Jongdae, one of his stupid friends, puts papers of money; all crispy and new. The cafeteria, like always, is busy and noisy. Kyungsoo woke up with a throbbing headache. And Jongdae just have to make everything worse.

"No," Kyungsoo says for the umpteenth time.

Jongdae whines and Baekhyun crunches up his face, tired of convincing Kyungsoo. Atleast Baekhyun is not whining about it anymore. Or maybe he's just in his emo phase again. The wires of his earphone are circling both his whole ear. He's always the weirdo bitch.

"We know you love dicks but Kyungsoo, its 150,000 WON! All you have to do is to not suck a dick until we graduated. Which is in two weeks," the elder explains. Again.

Baekhyun took off his earphones and turns to Kyungsoo.

"Stop sucking dicks and stay virgin for like, two weeks. Kyungsoo. You love dicks, you're obsessing over dicks but you're still a virgin. It should not be hard," the latter says before struggling to fit his earphones again. Kyungsoo snorts.

"Don't make me look like I'm sucking lots of dicks. I only sucks one," he defends, thinking what will be his lover's reaction if he hears how hoe Kyungsoo is.

"Just don't suck Jongin's dick and stay virgin for two weeks," Jongdae says exhasperately.

Kyungsoo looks at them. Baekhyun is looking at him while fiddling with his phone, while Jongdae is still pouting and frowning.

It shouldn't be a big deal. But Jongdae and Baekhyun are having a bet with Chanyeol and Sehun. Will he, Kyungsoo who's dating one of their professors, remains virgin until the end of the school year. Chanyeol and Sehun bets "No" for 250,000. Baekhyun and Jongdae bets "Yes" for 250,000. And now, his friends are asking him to "behave" with 150,000WON for them to win that fucking 250,000won. And pride. For beating two 187cm boys. That's how 'tight' Baekhyun's and Jongdae's prides are. Stupid. Idiots.

But Kyungsoo stares at the crispy papers, lying between Jongdae's fingers. He bet Baekhyun already gave his share. The pile money looks thick.

Maybe its the pleading eyes. Maybe it's Baekhyun's tired face. Maybe its Jongdae's pride.

Kyungsoo gulps.

"That.. That will be mine? All?"

Jongdae perks up at that. Baekhyun too, detaching his earphones and almost hurts his own ears. Who wears earphones snaking the wire up on their ears?

"Yeah. It'll be yours. All yours. Just no touching with your man," Kyungsoo rolls his eyes at how excited Jongdae is about this. Baekhyun seems chill, already commented yesterday that 'I think Kyungsoo can't. He loves Jongin's buffalo', in which Kyungsoo smacked Baekhyun's thigh that time.

"No kissing?"

"All. No kissing. No blows. No handjobs. No sex. Everything. Except hugs. Innocent hugs,"

Kyungsoo contemplates for a bit before he answers.

"Okay. That money is mine," Kyungsoo says with finality.

It's not like Baekhyun and Jongdae would find out if he finally gives Jongin what he wants, right?

They won't find out if he kiss Jongin, right?

Right?

 

\--------

 

"Fuck.. Yeah.. Just like that.." the elder rasps, combing Kyungsoo's fringe out of his eyes. Kyungsoo hums appreciatively, his mouth full of Jongin's girthy cock.

Kyungsoo flattens his tongue while sucking the rod, almost smirking if the rim of his mouth still has some space, but its full; when he feels Jongin's thighs go rigid under his palms.

He leans back and gulps the mixed saliva and cum inside his mouth. He fists the dick up and down, leaning forward to licks at the head once in a while.

"I want you to come on my face," Kyungsoo says with false innocence in his eyes, looking up onto Jongin under his lashes. His palm soft and barely fitting on the girth.

"Don't I always?" the other says between airy laughs and huff.

Kyungsoo leans in again, tongue flattening onto the head, and finally sucking the whole tip. Jongin grunts. Looking at Kyungsoo like this, under his table, on his knees and sucking diligently while jacking off.. It's a sight to see.

Seems like Kyungsoo notices his own abandoned cock that's dangling but hard outside of his pants. He fists his cock, hand goes up and down while sucking on Jongin's dick. The latter thrusts inside Kyungsoo's warm mouth slowly, almost purring when his head catches the tight throat bluntly. He fastens his thrusts, in and out, when he sees Kyungsoo's eyes turn cloudy and it didn't goes unnoticed, when Kyungsoo's body spasms a bit while his thighs clenches; eyebrows knitting.

"Fuck.. Did you just came?" Jongin says in amusement. Kyungsoo's soiled hands, transparent liquid dripping onto his wrist, find their companion again on top of Jongin's thighs. The elder moans when the sticky skin touches his, answering his conclusion that Kyungsoo really did came.

Its when Kyungsoo sucks diligently, tip of his tongue digging at the middle of Jongin's dick, that he feels his orgasm coming up. His soft combing turns into fisting, slow thrusts turns erratic.

"Hngg.." Kyungsoo moans, words such 'hyung' and 'please' muffled when the younger moans them.

Kyungsoo's nails dig onto Jongin's skin when the elder pulls out of his mouth, jacking off so closely into his chin. He opens his mouth willingly, lewdly.

Jongin grunts, hissing when he unloads his cock, clear liquid squirting over Kyungsoo's face.

Kyungsoo closes his eyes, enjoying the warm liquid scattered on his face. Jongin smears the cum on the younger's right cheek using the side of his tip. He feels his stomach goes hot inside when the tip of his dick digs onto Kyungsoo's soft cheek.

"Feels better?" he asks. Kyungsoo nods. Sighing a bit before his breathes turn normally.

Jongin leans forward to fishes out some wet wipes on his drawer. He leans closer to Kyungsoo, who's still on his knees under Jongin's table and between the elder's thighs now. He gently wipes the soft skin of Kyungsoo's face, careful with his lashes and eyelids who got some droplets of his cum. Jongin gets another wet wipes to make sure that Kyungsoo's clean. Completely ignoring his own exposed dick and how mixture of Kyungsoo's saliva and his own precum dries on his skin. His right thigh feels sticky too, courtesy of Kyungsoo's wet palm. He gives another wipe to Kyungsoo to wipe his own dick which the younger frowns to.

Jongin chuckles.

"Don't tell me you want me clean your dick too?" he says with a laugh. Kyungsoo huffs and quickly snatches the wipe, giving the elder a dirty look.

Jongin stands up, zipping his pants up. He almost zips his dick too when he saw Kyungsoo crawling out under the table, face all red and moves all slow and.. Kyungsoo looks like a slut. Seductive.

"Can you stand up?"

Kyungsoo looks up onto the elder, glaring as he scrambles onto his feet.

"Really? After fucking my mouth?" he tosses the dirty wipes on the side bin of Jongin's office table. Bitch, Jongin owns an office inside his own unit. Kyungsoo really got a daddy.

Jongin saunters close to him. Strong arms curling on his  middle. He feels Jongin nosing at his nape, kissing it softly. Kyungsoo fights the shiver that runs onto his spine. He fears that the other might feel it too and makes fun of him. Which the older always do.

"You sleepin' here?" Jongin's soft tone makes Kyungsoo blushes. It's good that the elder is hugging him from behind.

"Hm..", he hums answering the question. "I feel tired. Thanks," he says with a sharp glance at the side and Jongin laughs wholeheartedly. His heart leaps from the sound. Turning around, he hugs Jongin's neck and kisses him.

Jongin snakes his arms on Kyungsoo's waist, humming when he feels the soft love handles on Kyungsoo's torso. He loves it. Loves Kyungsoo's thickness all over his body. Mostly, his thighs.

"Hyung.." the younger whispers. Jongin doesn't want to get hard again. So he opts to just pecks the soft lips, smiling when Kyungsoo whines a bit but indulges to the softness and aftercare the elder is giving him.

Which cuts shortly when Kyungsoo's phone rings.

Fishing it out of his pants pocket, silently thanking whoever when the gudget didn't fall from earlier. He ignores Jongin's side comment of "because your thighs are thick it traps your phone" and read the messages.

He laughs loudly, almost huffing when he reads Jongdae's message.

'Please don't suck a dick. We still have 13 days. Please don't let Chanyeol and Sehun win' - Jongdad.

"What's that?"

He hears Jongin and looks at the side to see the latter reading the message. Kyungsoo snickers.

"Jongdae and Baekhyun have a bet with Chanyeol and Sehun. If I'll stay virgin until the end of the graduation," he says. Jongin snickers too but the glint in his eyes says otherwise, "and it includes to not suck any dick. And no kisses, they'll pay me 150,000 won," he ends.

The elder hums, looking straight into his eyes.

"You just sucked my dick,"

Kyungsoo snorts.

"Yeah. I did. It's not like they'll found out," he says and crosses his arms in front of his chest.

"Isn't that a bit too much? The money, I mean," Jongin comments and steps closer.

"Its not because they look at my virginity as something big. Its a matter of pride. Who will win,"

Jongin frowns at that. "Aren't you mad?"

He shrugs.

"I love playing dirty," he says. And the glint is back on Jongin's eyes again. The elder smirks.

"Right.." the other says, tone a deeper octave. "I just remember I promised to give you something expensive in exchange of your virginity.." Jongin leans closer, "the day of your graduation.."

"Yeah.." he rasps.

"You're winning, huh?" 

And Kyungsoo doesn't know it. This feelings. Some people might think he's a gold digger. Tricking his friend for money and get fuck, for the first time to make it dirtier, in exchange of the latest iPhone.

But Kyungsoo doesn't like the prizes. He likes when he tricks people. When he can play them on top of his soft palm. And Jongin is of them. Jongin found out about his scheme. Yet the older is looking at him like he's proud. Proud that Kyungsoo is this bitch. This much of a bitch he is. Getting whatever he wants without begging eben if Kyungsoo himself is loaded, thanks to his parents who haven't disown him. Jongin doesn't think he's dirty. And it makes Kyungsoo feels things.

He scoots closer. His fingers holds loosely on Jongin's necktie. His eyes feigning innocence. And Jongin knows how dirty Kyungsoo can get.

"Hyung.. I have a request," he whispers.

Jongin hums, leaning closer to nose Kyungsoo's cheek down to his neck.

"Can you eat me out?" Kyungsoo gasps as Jongin's teeth scrapes on his skin softly. "Please.."

He can feel the smirk on Jongin's lips on his his neck.

"Gladly.." Jongin replies in a sigh.

Kyungsoo ends his night writhing, all bear, nipples glistening because of Jongin's sucking and riding Jongin's rigid tongue.

 

\------

 

"How's the deprivation?"

Kyungsoo sends Baekhyun a glare when the latter kicks his hip softly to get a space for himself on the bed, where Kyungsoo is currently lying on his stomach.

"Oh.. You got a new laptop?" Baekhyun asks in awe. Kyungsoo smirks.

"Jongin hyung gave it to me. He's not using it," he says while tapping the touchpad and clicks 'Save'. Deadline can wait. Deadline is something easy for Kyungsoo. Where Baekhyun and Jongdae dies by just hearing the powerful word.

"Just how rich Professor Kim is?" Baekhyun flops down on the bed exhasperately. "Kris can't even give me a damn Tobleron!"

"You're still fucking with his shrinking dick?" Kyungsoo says in mild disgust.

Kris is the.. Well.. The most popular basketball player and he's so tall Kyungsoo almost drool at the first sight of the tall man on first time he sees him. He got the chance to suck the taller's dick and its huge. But Kyungsoo is just like that. He doesn't talk to him again after Kris gave him an old camera. He didn't suck his dick for the exchange, really. It just happened that Kyungsoo told him he needed one and Kris just happened to have one. And Kyungsoo just happened to be a opportunity taker. Or opportunist. He doesn't care what people thinks or what they calls him as long as he doesn't hurt anyone. And as long as people gives it to him, willingly.

Anyways, Kris is crossed out of his list when the foreigner calls out Yixing on twitter for choosing Junmyeon as project partner instead of him. Saying 'i thought we chinese bros' and 'maybe you sucks junmyeon's korean dick' and Kyungsoo got mad, quoted his tweet with capslock of "MAYBE HE WANTS TO GRADUATE AND WANTS A DECENT GRADE INSTEAD OF YOUR HALF COOKED BRAIN WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM WITH KOREANS, WHITE MAN WANNABE?!". Kyungsoo doesn't know why Baekhyun still dates him.

"He's not that bad," Baekhyun defends. Kyungsoo rolls his eyes.

"Sure, Jan,"

Baekhyun's phone rings even before he responds to Kyungsoo with more annoying words. Kyungsoo grimace when Baekhyun shrieks before answering the phone.

"Hello, Yeol?"

And judging by Baekhyun's giggles and side glances to him with failed seductive winks, Kyungsoo thinks that maybe they're all playing dirty here.

 

\------

 

He's mad. Kyungsoo's mad.

He doesn't know why Jongdae have to miss the classes for the day. And doesn't know why Baekhyun have to bring Kris along on their table.

"He's alone," Baekhyun reasons.

And Kris is sending him false glances, clearly not forgotten their beef before. The library is quiet aside from the murmurs of students, and faint noises outside courtesy of leaves swooshing because of the wind and people outside. But Kyungsoo is not in peace.

Even if Jongin is just meters away with mr. Jo at the library entrance, sending him looks earlier that almost made him pee on his pants. Why does Jongin have to wear his specs and his long sleeves? Students at the entrance look at him, sending him appreciative glances before entering the main hall of the library. But Jongin only has his eyes on Kyungsoo. Smirking over the wide window glass that separates them. 

Kyungsoo hates this day.

He makes sure to send a glare at Soojung, who in exchange rises an eyebrow at him. The bitch talked and touched Jongin's arm earlier. Kyungsoo doesn't like it a bit.

And Soojung have to be Kris' younger sister. He fucking hates their family.

"Throw your trash away, Baekhyun," he grits while glaring, sending sharp eyes to Kris eho doesn't even cower at him.

"Kyungsoo, don't be so rude," Baekhyun says with a pout. He latches his arms onto Kris' left arm. Its not that meaty. Unlike Jongin. Who is now inside the library and talking to some students, probably helping and answering some question regarding academics. He hopes.

"Don't mind him, Baekhyunnie," Baekhyun beams at the pet name.

Kyungsoo is beyond disgusted.

"Really, Baekhyun?" he says in disbelief. "Why are you even dating that chinese mac n cheese?!"

"Hey! Stop being a racist!" Kris retorts.

"I'm petty, bitch!" Kyungsoo counters with pure animosity.

"Can you please stop?!" Kris says. He's clearly tired of Kyungsoo's shits. But Kyungsoo himself isn't.

"Stop fucking Baekhyun's korean ass, then!" he says loudly.

He sees Soojung looking at them, curious. Chanyeol and Sehun stopped too from what are they doing. If they're really doing anything or just cutting classes.

But of course, Jongin.

"Mr. Do, what's happening there?" 

Kyungsoo huffs as Jongin steps closer on to their table, almost tearing up from the rage he feels. Gosh, he hates white men who downgrade asians.

"Mr. Kim-" Baekhyun tries. But Jongin held a hand up.

"I'm asking Mr. Do,"

And Jongin's tone sounds so strict. Like he doesn't like what Kyungsoo did.

"What happened?" the professor repeats.

Other students are still sitting but looking at their way, enjoying the show. Kyungsoo grits his teeth when he sees Soojung smirking. If its because Kyungsoo is in hotseat or because Jongin looks so hot while mad, he doesn't know. Maybe both.

"I.. I told him to go away," he says.

"No. You told Baekhyun to throw his trash away which is me," Kris seconds.

Jongin is looking at him with unreadable expression.

"What else?" Jongin asked. Kyungsoo gulps. Jongin must be really mad. And disappointed. Kyungsoo wants to cry.

"I.. I was just so mad because of what he said about Junmyeon and Yixing before. I just don't want Baekhyun to get the same treatment. What's wrong with being asian?!" he says, teeth gritting and he spits the words to Kris instead of Jongin. Baekhyun looks at him, clearly guilty that he has been dismissing Kyungsoo's concern for him, always thought its only because he hates Kris.

"I already apologized to Junmyeon, okay?" the chinese canadian student says. 

"What about when you said Yuri looks ugly because she's tanned?" Kyungsoo counters. Kris rolls his eyes and sighs.

"It was just a joke," Kris starts. Kyungsoo almost throw the aluminium pencil case he's holding to Kris but Jongin and Baekhyun stopped him.

"I already apologized to her and besides we're friends, okay? Its just a inside joke!" the other reasons.

"Still! Its still not right!" Kyungsoo says. His body rigid from too much hate. He hates when people mocks other people like they're perfect. He isn't perfect too. He knows that. But he can't stop the rage too.

"You're right. Still. Its wrong even if its inside joke. Same goes to you. Just because he said something terrible means you have to act terrible, too. Kyungsoo,"

Kyungsoo looks at Jongin. It hurts to see Jongin looking at him with so much disappointment.

"But I am a petty person, Mr. Kim," Kyungsoo says. He doesn't care if its inappropriate, consider that Jongin is standing in front of him as a teacher, not his lover.

Kyungsoo saw how Jongin's jaw hardened. His eyes turning slits before setting back to normal.

"Then maybe you should stop that. Change that attitude. Stop thinking you're right when you counters a race with another race,"

Kris shifts on his seat uncomfortably. Chanyeol and Sehun are just looking. Soojung is hiding a smile. And Baekhyun looks like he's about to cry.

And so does Kyungsoo.

Because out of all people, aside from Baekhyun and Jongdae, he always thought that Jongin understands him. Jongin should know how Kyungsoo's mind works. He told Jongin already. He's the pettiest person he'll ever known. He says things that might offend others and he stands in his own beliefs and perspective. Jongin should know this is how Kyungsoo is and Kyungsoo doesn't like the idea of changing his attitude, personality for others to fit, no. Kyungsoo is Kyungsoo for his own liking. That's why he only befriends people who understands him. And Jongin told him he loves that about Kyungsoo.

But why is he like this now? Kyungsoo would understand if its just for front, just acting for other people to not suspect them. But Jongin is looking at him with dripping disappointment.

Kyungsoo smiles. Not reaching his eyes but he smiles. And he saw how Jongin's lips stutter, like he touched something so personal inside Kyungsoo. Like he did something he should have not did.

"You'll ask me to apologize, right? Okay," Kyungsoo says. He looks at Kris and Baekhyun. And opens his mouth.

"I'm sorry for what I did, for what I said. I was mad and I got carried away and voicing out my rage didn't end up well because I downgrade another person. I don't really care what people will tell me. If I'm a terrible person with a terrible way of thinking but right now, I'm apologizing. I'm also apologizing for being me," kyungsoo sees in his peripheral view how Jongin clutches his fist into ball, tight and strong before calming his own self. "I'm really sorry," he says.

He turns to Jongin and bows a bit. "I'm sorry, too, Mr. Kim,"

And he turns to Baekhyun.

"I'm sorry for being such a bad friend," he bows. Baekhyun's lips are tightly pursed.

"I'm going now. I'm sorry.." he says before gathering his things and makes his way out of the library.

His tears fall when he's completely out of the vacinity of the library.

He only half meant what he said. Because he's really like that. Petty. But he really is sorry for being himself, for the first time. That he thought he's surrounding his self with people who understand him. He feels sorry he thought Baekhyun likes that about him. That Jongin loves that about him and completely understands him. He will understand if they got mad. He really will understand. But Jongin, Jongin who knows all of his flaws, asked him to change his self. And Kyungsoo chokes on his own tears.

Its not about the humility. Not about his rage for Kris' behavior. Its about the betrayal he feels right now.

He knows he's not perfect. He is really petty at another level. Its in his nature to judge lots of things, sometimes quietly and sometimes voicing them out. He knows he's a complete bitch but that is how he is. He chose his friends wisely because like him, they are at the same page. Understanding, hates when people doesn't disrespect others yet they are bitches themselves. And he doesn't have to change when he knows despite his attitude, no one complains about it. Even Kris. He doesn't and haven't hurt anyone even if he's like that. Because people around him are just like him. And completely understands him. Or so he thought.

Judging by the way Baekhyun defends Kris and Jongin's disappointed stare with his suggestion of "change", maybe Kyungsoo is really a terrible person. For caring to his friend to not date a racist guy and for trusting his boyfriend that he really understands him and always respect his point of view and personality but maybe.. Maybe he just really need to change.

 

He feels so insecure and empty for the first time.

 

\------

 

"Did they really?" Jongdae asks in disbelief. His friend is walking back and forth while Kyungsoo fiddles with the hem of his shirt. His back hurts from lying on the bed all day but he doesn't want to talk to anyone. Except Jongdae.

He deactivated his sns account, Facebook and Twitter. And doesn't answer any phone calls and messages. He doesn't even bother to read the messages. If he's grown up and mature enough, Kyungsoo would accept it and doesn't need to get away with people but he has feelings and he wants to avoid them. People and feelings. He wants to avoid both.

Jongdae walks up to him and detach his fidgeting hands on his shirt.

"Can you stop doing that?! You look nervous! It's weird!," Jongdae says.

Kyungsoo sighs.

"Jongdae.. Do you think I'm a terrible person?"

Jongdae glances at Kyungsoo. And he feels like crying because Kyungsoo is a great person. No matter how petty and savage he is, Kyungsoo is one of the kindest person he ever met. Jongdae sits beside him and smack Kyungsoo's hand that is about to fiddle with the hem of his shirt again.

"No, Kyungsoo.. You're not a terrible person. You are a great person. You might have a mouth that doesn't filter but you're a great person. You might be savage and hates lots of things but that's you. You care too much to the point you say things people are scared to point out, people choose to ignore or doesn't bother about. You gives attention too much because you care about us, you're frank and true to yourself. Its okay to hate lots of things and its okay to hate lots of people. Its okay to be petty and its okay to voice them out as long as you know you're not hurting anyone. You know your place and knows how and when to react. You hates for a reason. They might find it offending but as long as you don't target them intentionally. I think its okay to be savage to people intentionally as long as you have a reason. Kris might not hurt you and he offended you but you're a korean too its okay to react. And Baekhyun is our friend.." Jongdae touches his hand and grips it, grip that comforts Kyungsoo to no end.

"And its okay.. Its okay to be terrible. To think that way. To care too much. Its okay to be yourself. Its okay to hate because you're not a real person if you don't hate things or anyone. Kyungsoo.. You're a great friend and a great person. You're not fake. You shows how you really are to avoid expectations because you hate when people who don't know you complements you. And I think you're really amazing. You're an amazing person.." Jongdae says earnestly.

Kyungsoo's tears are falling now.

"Even if I'm an opportunist?" he says with a sniff.

Jongdae laughs.

"You won't believe it but we love you wholeheartedly, me and Baekhyun. I now Baekhyun loves you. And we know you're not opportunist. You just grab opportunities but you're not gold digger," Jongdae says while wiping Kyungsoo tears.

And Kyungsoo laughs for the first time that day.

\------

Kyungsoo opens his phone for the first time that night after having a heart to heart talk with Jongdae. There are lots of messages. Lots of missed calls.

He scrolls and found Jongin's 14 messages and 8 missed calls.

54 messages and 21 missed calls from Baekhyun.

Kyungsoo sighs deeply before sending a reply, or message to Baekhyun since he doesn't have any intention to reply to any of Baekhyun's messages.

 

'hello, bitch'

 

He taps 'send'.

Not even a minute and his phone rings.

He answers the call and ends it immediately when he is met with Baekhyun's familiar whale screech. The phone rings again and Kyungsoo is thankful with Baekhyun's soft sob of "Kyungsoo".

"Kyungsoo oh my god are you mad at me? Please tell  you're not oh my god I'm so sorry I'm really sorry!" Baekhyun cries like a drama queen he is.

Kyungsoo fiddles again with his sweater, looking for nice words to say. But eventually gave up since he doesn't really knows how to be nice. He can hear Jongdae hundred meters away how Kyungsoo is a great person even if he's not nice most of the time.

"It's fine. And I'm not mad. I was sad and empty but I'm not mad. I'm sorry, Baekhyun," he finally says.

"No!", Baekhyun says on the other line, "I should apologize! Its not victim card or what but Kyungsoo I really am sorry for being such a bad friend! I always thought it's only because you hate Kris but it never registers to me that you only care for me! I am so sorry!" Baekhyun is not crying bit he sounds so sorry, like when he almost stepped on Mongmeul because he thought the pup was a rag and when he accidentally spill Jongdae's biggest secret when Jongdae is so sensitive about the topic.

He smiles and assures Baekhyun he's not mad with 'I am not mad, okay?'. But he's not Kyungsoo if he won't badmouth Kris in front of Baekhyun's salad. He also didn't expect that Baekhyun would agree.

"Kris is still a dick tho," he says. He's waiting for Baekhyun's defending words. But instead he hears "oh god yes he's an asshole".

"Baekhyun, please don't hate him just because he hates me and because I hate him. I might not like him for you but if you really like him.." Kyungsoo was cut by Baekhyun's deep sigh. He can hear the eye roll.

"Nope, Soo. He really is a dick. We talked and I told him its all misunderstanding and that I don't I hate you and that I'm worried about you and Jongin but you know what he said? He said 'serves him right' and I pinch his balls. He didn't attend classes today and I'm not even sorry," Baekhyun finishes with a loud huff that sounds like a failed air blow on Kyungsoo's ears but he laughs.

"Are we okay now?" Baekhyun asks.

"We always are," Kyungsoo says with a smile.

"You know I love you, right?" 

And Kyungsoo's eyebrows contort in impending tears. But Baekhyun doesn't have to know that.

"Of course."

Jongin's messages and missed calls remain unanswered.

 

\-----

 

Kyungsoo was walking with Jongdae and Baekhyun that day at the hallway, laughing at Baekhyun's story of Chanyeol's failed sexting and hitting Jongdae and when the latter screams "oh my god I love homo flirting!" when Baekhyun stopped laughing and Jongdae stopped walking and Kyungsoo was confused and he looked at the front where Jongin stands.

That was earlier that day and now they're inside Jongin's familiar unit.

"You want some drinks? Juice? Flavored tea?" the elder asks. Kyungsoo shakes his head and looks at Jongin with questioning eyes.

"What are we going to talk about? I have papers to work on," he lies. Because he all finished them already and just want to go home. Baekhyun is clearly not hating on him and still thinks he's a friend to keep but he doesn't know about Jongin.

Jongin looks down and sighs.

"Right.. Graduation is coming.."

Kyungsoo hums in answer.

They shouldn't be awkward like this. They could've been kissing and cuddling now. They could've been watching movies and tickling each others now.

He thought Jongin would passes on it and let him go home, or atleast send him home. But he doesn't expect Jongin's tight embrace when he steps closer to Kyungsoo's personal space and mumbles an apology.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry for what I said to you back then.." he whispers while kissing Kyungsoo's forehead. The smaller feels tired suddenly. He doesn't want to talk about it. But he also wants Jongin to assure him that he still loves him. Still accepts him for what he is.

"It's fine. You were right back there," he says. But Jongin shakes his head.

"I might stand in my opinion that you shouldn't talk back but I was wrong from telling you to change.. I was so wrong.. I knew the moment you looked at me with those broken eyes, I knew I fucked up.."

Kyungsoo's eyes are cloudy. His vision blurring from tears that are threatening to fall. He doesn't like this kind of conversation but if he wants a serious relationship with Jongin, they should really talk about it.

"I should have not told you, should not really tell you to change because you're you.. I am so sorry.. I really am.. Its your right to feel like that because you care for your friend. And it might not be right to tell those words to Kris even if he tells much more horrible things but everyone's not perfect.  You too. You are not perfect. But I love that about you. Your filthy mouth and savage mind. But I did the opposite thing that day. I was disappointed. But I also forgot you are really that person. Petty and will say what you want to voice out. I should've respect you and your point of view. You told me people who deserves respect will gain it and.. And I must say Kris doesn't deserve any respect for what he did. He gives you reason to be mad and I should've look on that and not think about how my preference works.. I should've considered yours.. I'm sorry.." 

Jongin is holding his cheeks and Kyungsoo can't stop crying. He can't stop because Jongin, his Jongin still looks at him and thinks about him the same way and still respects him for what he is. His Jongin still loves him, afterall.

The elder thumbs Kyungsoo's cheeks to wipe the tears away. Jongin's eyes are full of regret and Kyungsoo hates it.

"It's okay.. Everyone makes mistakes and I did one back there. It's just.. I won't change myself being the way I am only to fit myself with other people's preferences. This is me and I'm really bad with bad people and.. I am not kind, I'm not nice but.. But I'm a great person.." he says. Because he knows he is. 

He loves his friends and his family and his dogs and he loves Jongin and he always makes sure all of them are happy and all of them are all appreciated and he thinks that is what a great person is. He understands and doesn't judge people easily even if he's savage and hates people in general. He knows where to throw his trashes and doesn't cross the street when it's still red at stoplight. He always helps when a person needs to, giving coins to people who needs it and helps elders to carry their bags. He cooks for his parents and always make them proud with his high grades and gpa and his attitude towards people who deserves the treatment. He knows he is a great person and he knows he needs to acknowledge that sometimes.

Jongin nods and smiles.

"Yes, you are.. You're really a great person, Soo.. You really are.." and Jongin's kissing his forehead.

Kyungsoo thinks its okay to appreciate yourself sometimes. Its not the pride and carrying your own chair. It's called self loving.

\-------

"What are you doing?"

It's a week before the graduation and Kyungsoo, just like other years and other days, is with his friends again.

"I'm eating alive squids," he says with unamused look to Baekhyun. The latter pouts.

"What are you even tweeting? Its a boring day," 

"That's what I'm doing. Tweeting that this day is boring because I haven't suck any dick for 8 days," which is not true. He was, last night, fucking his own mouth with Jongin's hung dick. He was thinking earlier while taking a bath how would such thing will get onto him while touching his rim, not inserting any finger but horrified what if his skin rips. What is he going to tell the doctors, if ever.

He's scrolling, laughing at other tweets when he stumbles at Soojung's account. The girl is really beautiful with her over the roof aesthetic tweets. Kyungsoo feels like puking. But the petty person he is, reads her tweets.

One certain tweet and his blood boils. Baekhyun beside him gasps when he too reads the four tweet thread.

 

'mr kim looks so hot when he's mad  amigas'  
'anyways, he got mad bcse of ksoo lfmao'  
'he is: cancelledt'  
'its been days and im still laughing'

 

"Bitch.." he hears Baekhyun saying.

Kyungsoo closed his eyes.

Jongin's words, Jongdae's words and also Baekhyun's keep on running onto his head.

He is Kyungsoo. He doesn't have to change. It's okay to be petty. Right?

He taps the 'Quote Tweet' and types in.

 

'You really envy me that much mr kim gives more attention to me? Deact your acct bby girl'

 

Kyungsoo does regret that when Soojung blocked him. Baekhyun laughs hysterically at that.

Guess he needs another account to see Soojung's tweets.

Jongdae comes after a while and asks the dreading question.

"Chanyeol reminds me about the bet. You still virgin, right? Okay,"

Jongdae didn't even wait for an answer.

 

\------

 

"Aahh.. Ah, fuck!" 

Kyungsoo moans out loud as he thrashes on the bed. Jongin hovering above him, staring at him and his eyes are clouded with lust. He pinches Kyungsoo's nipples and see the latter wriths and whimpers.

Kyungsoo rides his fingers, body glistening and Jongin rams his fingers faster when he stares for too long. How Kyungsoo opens his legs and his body going ups and downs on his fingers. The younger's mouth is agape, toes curling and uncurling from pleasure for being penetrated for the first time.

"Ah.. Aahh.. Jongin hyung, please.." 

Jongin pushes knuckles deep. His own grunts mixing with Kyungsoo's moans and cries even if his dick is well kept inside his pants. Hearing Kyungsoo's moans and the feeling of the warm heat enveloping his fingers are enough to make him feel hot and horny. Kyungsoo archs his back and neck, pinkish even without Jongin's treatment.

It was supposed to be an evening hang out. And just like always, they made out. But Kyungsoo frisky. Humping Jongin's lap and sucking hickeys on the bronze shoulder. They ended up in bed. And Jongin lost his sanity when Kyungsoo asked him how does it feel, to have something inside his ass.

Jongin feels he touch a spongy thing, when his fingers go deeper and crooked and Kyungsoo gasps out loud.

"Oh my god, fuck! Yes there! There!" Kyungsoo shrieks.

Jongin pulls out his fingers and takes his shirt off, revealing six pack abs and caramel skin, smooth and blemished. Kyungsoo brings his both palm on his face, pleasure sizzling and body spasms without the actual climax.

"Hyung.. Please bring it back.. Please, put it back.." Kyungsoo says with tears in his eyes. Jongin leans down and kisses Kyungsoo's tears away, tongue poking the soft cheeks. 

"Shh.. Relax," he says as his fingers skirts down to Kyungsoo's stomach, down to his hips and to his dick that's still hard. Jongin jacks him off a bit.

The fingers are tracing his crack, tips teasing the rim. Kyungsoo muffles his whimpers with a grip of his palm over his mouth.

Jongin kisses him, their lips slant to each other and both tongues touching each other lips when Jongin pushes his fingers again. He didn't go slow after that. Wrists twisting, fingers bending in a crook and Kyungsoo back to being a moaning and writhing mess.

"Oh my god ah! Please! Please! Ah!"

Jongin feasts on the view. Kyungsoo's fringe sticking on his forehead and arching his back as Jongin finger fucks him.

He doesn't notice when his fingers go faster, wants to fuck Kyungsoo's brain out. Its an instinct when Jongin leans down to capture one of Kyungsoo's nipples, dominant pride rising as Kyungsoo cries and grips on his hair. He can feel how Kyungsoo rises his hips to fuck himself on the fingers and he feels so proud to make Kyungsoo like this. Pleasured and a writhing mess.

He knows Kyungsoo's close. Judging the ways his thick thighs wraps securely on his waist and the choked gasps. He latches his lips on the pinkish neck, moaning from the salty taste of Kyungsoo's sweat.

Kyungsoo continues to grip his hair, almost clinging onto Jongin, his body almost up and not attaching on the anymore while Jongin fucks him with his fast fingers.

Kyungsoo's body turns rigid, thighs clenching and moans cutting off with a choked breath. Jongin feels a sticky substance shoots onto his stomach. He leans back and puts Kyungsoo down on the bed, his fingers still inside Kyungsoo's hot walls.

Jongin pulls his fingers out, unzipping his pants to pull out his uncomfortable dick and breathes in relief when its finally out of its confinement. He gathers Kyungsoo's cum on his palm and uses it to slick his hard cock. He pumps earnestly as he watches Kyungsoo, who still trembles for a second then spasms, like he really got dicked.

Jongin came from watching Kyungsoo touching his stomach, smearing his own drying release and joins touching his dick with a trembling hand. He lies next to Kyungsoo and kisses his reddening neck. A hickey forming but Jongin is not sorry. Kyungsoo can wear turtle neck anyways. Even if its July and the weather is warmer these days.

"I'm sorry," he says with a smile. He laughs when he heard a snort coming from Kyungsoo.

"You don't sound sorry, asshole," but Kyungsoo hugs him and Jongin kisses his temple.

They didn't fuck and Kyungsoo wants to be fair for the bet. Even if he did something more than sucking Jongin's dick, which is on the not-to-dos list of the rule.

 

\-------

 

A day before the graduation and Kyungsoo's still a virgin. He sighs. Guess he'll graduate like a man version of mama Mary.

Jongdae is eyeing him. And Baekhyun is not talking.

"What?"

"You two fucked," the two answers in unison.

"What?!" he asks again.

The other two turns to him and Jongdae wails.

"I thought we already talk about this?! No sucking dicks and no fucking until graduation!" 

The other passengers at the bus give them stinky glances. But Kyungsoo is too bitch be ashamed. Baekhyun pouts. They lost the bet.

"We didn't fuck but I sucked his dick?" he says sheepishly.

"Are you asking me?! We lost!" Jongdae cries and Kyungsoo rolls his eyes.

"You know you can just tell that I didn't get fuck, right? You can just lie. You don't have to pay me," he says after a yawn.

"We can?" Jongdae asks with his child-like tone.

"Hmm," he hums.

"I like it more if its a authentically win but I guess I like to trick Chanyeol and Sehun," Baekhyun says and turns to Kyungsoo. "We're still winning, anyways".

"Damn, right. We are," Kyungsoo and Jongdae shout almost at the same time.

Baekhyun smiles and pulls out his phone, texting someone.

"Why are you telling Sehun you're going to class?" Jongdae asks. Kyungsoo takes a peek too.

"We're going out on a date?"

Kyungsoo frowns at that.

"I thought Chanyeol?"

"Bitch, just how much dicks can you take?" Jongdae garners pairs of disgusted glances again but they ignore it.

Kyungsoo yawns again and leans at the window pane of the bus.

 

\-------

 

He might not got fucked by Jongin before graduation and he was kinda sad for the lost of new iPhone.

But Jongin, who loves to surprise Kyungsoo, still gave him the phone that Kyungsoo's been drooling for months.

And they still got the crispy money papers worth 250,000won from Chanyeol and Sehun, who were suspicious but didn't protest and just gave them the money with forlorn faces.

 

He didn't got dicked. He didn't get the 150,000won.

He failed to trick Baekhyun and Jongdae.

But three of them, all of them won, anyways.

 

And Kyungsoo is still happy about that.

**Author's Note:**

> sorry :(


End file.
